My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

I have been dating my boyfriend for about 14 months now. I love him to death and we have often spoke of marriage. Well the truth is is that his wild past scares me alot!

When he was in high school, he was a heavy partier, experimenting with drugs and drinking. He also fooled around with alot of girls as well. He never had sex b/c he grew up christian .

A couple of months ago, I was reading his myspace messages. (Before you judge me, he lets me and I was just innocently trying to re-visit old times and see our first messages to each other when we first likes each other) and of course curiosity got the best of me and i read alot of his old messages from before we were dating were he was flirting and talking sexually to many girls...

Here's my question- Can people just really drop that player lifestyle and become fully comitted to one person? Do you think he has the urge to live that life again? Should this kinda thing bother me?

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

Absolutely 100% YES people can do that!!!

:]]]]]

I have a great experience story to share with you, and I think you'll feel better.

One of my ex's was almost exactly like your boyfriend. He partied a lot, drank a lot, especially early on in high school. He usually hung out with all the kids everyone knew did drugs, he was literally known for being a "player" and did everything he could to get in trouble.

When he and I started dating, he gradually started to see how uncomfortable I was with all crazy choices he was making, and he began to clean up his act even before it became a problem between the two of us.

Honest to goodness, he stayed the same person he is at heart, he just made better choices. We broke up several months later because I moved to a new area and long distance was harder than we expected, but to this day he's one of my best friends and he's happy in a new relationship, as am I. He's still clean, still sober, and no one who knows him now can imagine him as a ladies man. :]

Your boyfriend is being honest with you--the guys who really care about changing or making an effort to "clean up" are always honest about it, and you have to give them credit. If you've been with your boo for a while and you know you can trust him--do it. You won't regret it!

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

It's entirely possible. We're expected to grow and mature as we get older. If he wanted to be living that lifestyle again, then he would be doing it.

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

He never had sex!!! HAHAHAHA,,,that's my answer.

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

Yes, it is possible, but it rarely ever happens.

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

I think you need to be in this relationship with this man more than 14 months before you guys talk about marriage..especially if your having doubts about his lifestyle before you started dating him..

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

if this bothers you than you are not ready for a relationship with him. Those things will always be there in the past. If you can not look past them then you have an issue that you can never resolve. It is not wrong for it to bother you but if you want to have a good relationship you will have to leave the past in the past. We all do things when we are young that are not the brightest things. I think you need to evaluate your ability to handle a mature relationship and to trust the other person.

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

HAUNTS YOU ??

is he a ghost! ?

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

Girl you just may be overreacting a lil bit.. A young man talking sexual to girls over the Internet b-4 he met you is normal. That's what young men do.. As long as he has been faithful to you and he loves you that's all that matter. The past is the past let it stay there. You can't worry about what he may do. Be secure about what he has done. As long as you are not stifling him you guys might make it.. He don't sound like a player to me. A player is someone who sleeps around alot. not drinking and going to parties.. Stop worrying and enjoy..

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

Dear Carly,

The most important fact in a relationship is to accept each other on a 'as-it-is-where-it-is basis'. Did he like you with all your idiosyncrasies and behaviourial aspects? Does he like you as a good partner in bed too? Does he want to change or mould any of your traits? If the answers are YES, YES %26amp; NO, then why are you worried about his past e-talking with girls?

Then you ask yourself if you'd be able to accept him in totality? Would be asking him to change according to your choice and wishes?

My suggestions would be as follows. Ask him in a most loving and passionate way if he also masturbates or not in addition to assumed sex you might have enjoyed together, and don't get upset if the answer comes as YES!

Boys do variety of things related to sex and sexual aspects. But that doesn't mean they are infidels. Tell him how you'd love to know from him every minute details from his kidy days to his adolescent days until you met him. Also keep reciprocating with your stories, unfolding each and every details, including girlish talks you had in school change rooms. That would make you and him GREAT buddies.

Wish you all the best for everything.

Friendly hug and love for you two.

Yours e-mailingly

:-)

My Boyfriends Past still Haunts Me?!?!?

trust your own heart if you really are not sure what to do then talk to him about it. and believe what he say if you really trust him